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It was a very somber and emotional day today. My wife, my son, and myself attended a memorial service for the son of some very dear friends today. This young man, Ben, was one of the most robust, outgoing, positive, caring, and gentle young person that I have ever had the pleasure to know. At the age of 19 his life was cut short doing what he loved most, hiking and climbing. In his short time on this earth he influenced a multitude of people from young to old with his zest for life. On Friday the 30th of June he and his sister, Malia, said goodbye to their parents and headed out for what was a normal outing for the two of them. A weekend trip of camping, hiking and climbing. He hugged both of his parents told them he loved them and they drove off like they had done dozens of times. They headed to the mountains of southwest Montana and headed out with their back packs and headed up the trail head after setting up camp went for their hike and climb after getting to a certain point Malia stopped and watched her brother go on higher and farther like she had done many times before, watching him ascend terrain she wasn't comfortable with. Then to her horror watched as he slipped and fell. She was able to call for help and Ben held on until help arrived and was then air lifted to a small hospital in North West Wyoming and later life flighted to a hospital in south central Montana where he passed on July 1st.
As I sat and looked around the church where the service was held and looked at the amount of people that were in attendance, 700 plus, I was in awe at how many lives this young man touched. At the very end of the service his Dad got up in front of everyone, how he held his composure I will never know he asked all of the young people that were Ben's friends to stand up. My son and 200 other kids stood up. Most of these kids were not with parents, they came on their own accord. They respected and loved this young man because he knew what it meant to be a friend. His dad stood there and just took it all in, he groaned multiple times from within as he struggled to keep it together. Thankful for the support of all that were there, he then thanked all of them for coming and told them that just because Ben was gone didn't mean he wanted their relationship with his family to end, that he, his wife, and Malia needed all of them to help them hold it together. He told them he needed them to come by, especially the young men, and to hug him because he would never be able to hold his son again and he was really going to need that over the next few months. Then he gently reminded all of us parents to look at our kids, not to sweat the small stuff and to Hug and to Hold them. It was at this point that I lost it. All of the issues that I've had with my kids seemed to disappear and become very trivial in the spectrum of life. I know that this may not be the platform and this may get me in trouble, but if there are those who would be so inclined to lift the Tessenier family before the Lord in prayer for their loss, I would humbly encourage those to do so. And as his dad reminded us parents, Hug and Hold your Kids, Pick your battles, tell them that you love them, and hold on to them. I've already prepared my two sons and told them that out of the blue they are going to be hugged randomly, even though they are 21 and 18 years old and tower over me by 3" at 6'5". I can't imagine the feeling of their loss.
As I sat and looked around the church where the service was held and looked at the amount of people that were in attendance, 700 plus, I was in awe at how many lives this young man touched. At the very end of the service his Dad got up in front of everyone, how he held his composure I will never know he asked all of the young people that were Ben's friends to stand up. My son and 200 other kids stood up. Most of these kids were not with parents, they came on their own accord. They respected and loved this young man because he knew what it meant to be a friend. His dad stood there and just took it all in, he groaned multiple times from within as he struggled to keep it together. Thankful for the support of all that were there, he then thanked all of them for coming and told them that just because Ben was gone didn't mean he wanted their relationship with his family to end, that he, his wife, and Malia needed all of them to help them hold it together. He told them he needed them to come by, especially the young men, and to hug him because he would never be able to hold his son again and he was really going to need that over the next few months. Then he gently reminded all of us parents to look at our kids, not to sweat the small stuff and to Hug and to Hold them. It was at this point that I lost it. All of the issues that I've had with my kids seemed to disappear and become very trivial in the spectrum of life. I know that this may not be the platform and this may get me in trouble, but if there are those who would be so inclined to lift the Tessenier family before the Lord in prayer for their loss, I would humbly encourage those to do so. And as his dad reminded us parents, Hug and Hold your Kids, Pick your battles, tell them that you love them, and hold on to them. I've already prepared my two sons and told them that out of the blue they are going to be hugged randomly, even though they are 21 and 18 years old and tower over me by 3" at 6'5". I can't imagine the feeling of their loss.
